up is down

There are people I miss too much. A place I miss too much. Holes I want filled. Things I don't understand. Battles against my flesh that I don't want to fight. An upcoming winter I'm afraid to look in the eye. Emotions that feel both wrong but right but are only feelings, really. Cravings that beg to be satisfied. Dishwashers to be loaded. Head colds to endure.

I know the answer is simple. Jesus. But who'd have thought that simplicity could be painful, surrender could be a daily battle, and humility and pride could walk hand-in-hand on the trestles of one's heart?

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from Your presence or take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." 
- Psalm 51: 10-12


  1. Amen and Amen. It isn't easy and yet once fully surrendered the peace and joy is immeasurable.
    Thanks for sharing!

    Philippians 3:8

    Yes doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ,

    1. "It isn't easy and yet once fully surrendered the peace and joy is immeasurable."

      Wow, I needed this reminder. :) Thank you!

  2. This is beautifully written, Em. And I love that Bible verse at the end of your post. One of my favorites! =)

    1. Thank you. :) It's one of my favorite verses, too.